I am 23 years old now and I’m 16 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend (which is now my ex) and I were living in together for 7 months which I got pregnant but to sum it up our relationship last for 1 year and 1 month. We’re planning to get married 4 years from now because we still need to help his younger brother to finish his study first. I also told him if that’s the case then I don’t also want a baby at this moment. Marriage first before a baby. Which we agreed. But he always told me that he wants a child and I can really see happiness when he will saw a baby, that’s why I thought he will stand for us if that time will come.
And then here it goes I’m pregnant for 2 months when we both now it. I cried. How about my career? I want to take my board exam first (I’m a nursing graduate). How about my life? These were the questions that runs into my mind during that time. But surprisingly my boyfriend was happy and excited after we have seen 2 lines on that PT. So we did go to OB for a check up and we found out I was 2 months pregnant.
Things first between us were okay. We agreed that we will be staying together no matter what for our baby. So we decided to tell everything to his family. And then we were shocked his father the soon to be grandfather of our child tells us that I should go on abortion. They don’t want the child. They already did give precautions to my boyfriend. My boyfriend has a lot of duty as the eldest on the family. The house it’s not yet finished. If my boyfriend will decide to marry me how stupid son he is. This is according to his father which changes everything. My boyfriend did change his decision. He will choose his family rather us. I did kneel to him beg that please we need him he didn’t.
Then one time his family decided to meet my family to talk about everything. My family do want marriage. My family is conservative and not open minded on having a child without marriage. Aside from that it’s painful for them since I’m the youngest on our 6 siblings. But instead his family did say NO. They want’s us to live together without marriage my family doesn’t want that and then my boyfriend was there standing doing nothing so we did break up for I think 3 days. I decided to resigned on my job because I’m working on night shift and I’m afraid that it will affects my babies development. After that 3 days my boyfriend contacted me and ask for another chance which I did gave to him. And I went home staying with my family since my boyfriend cannot afford to raise us due to his low wage. After a week things turns difficult again. My boyfriend broke up with me. So I did decide to go back to him to choose him over my family. We need him. My baby needs a father.
So I went back and the truth really reveals everything. When I was their he’s not the gut that I used to knew before. Even her mother was their to get rid of me out of his life. I can still remember the wors that he utters in front of me and on his mother. “I TOLD HER TO GO AWAY. I DON’T LOVE HER ANYMORE. WE’RE OVER. I DON’T WANT ANY RESPONSIBILITY. ” Those word stabbed my heart like a dagger. I did comeback for the child. This fight is for my child but how can I win this if the father of my child doesn’t wants us anymore. It’s so painful. Very painful.
At this moment I’m still fighting for my depression. I wan’t to focus on my baby. I wan’t to forget everything about him. My baby needs me more than anything else in this world so I need to be strong. My family is always their for me. They do still accepts me and continue to show there support and love to me. And also my friends were always their when I needed them. I know everything happens for a reason. God want’s us to allow him to take over everything in our life. We just need to trust Him and don’t lean on our own understanding. This baby is a blessing and it’s my responsibility to give the best for this child because i am the MOTHER. I’m hoping for a normal baby, a normal delivery on September and a cure on my wounded heart in God’s will… 🙂