Jane’s Story

My story is one that illustrates how beautiful and precious every child is, no matter when or how they come.  I never considered abortion, but even so I think others might benefit from seeing how God works in the most stressful of situations, and also that we women are a lot tougher than we give ourselves credit for.
I was a married mother of four children — 5 yrs, almost 4 yrs, 2 yrs, and 9 months — when I found out that I was unexpectedly pregnant for the fifth time. My husband was in the military, and we were living far from family and friends.  I was just starting to feel like I’d gotten my feet back under me after having so many children in such a rapid succession when I found out that we were expecting again.  I had experienced extreme morning sickness with all of my pregnancies — the kind that renders you a temporary invalid.  My husband was leaving for military training soon for three months, so basically during the most extreme nausea of the pregnancy I would be totally on my own, being horribly sick and caring for the four little ones all on my own. Thankfully, when I told my husband he smiled and hugged me, and did his best to encourage me. Then he had to leave.
There were countless mornings when I hung on to the toilet, seemingly vomiting all my insides out and listening to all my little ones  downstairs and realizing that I somehow had to pull it together and get everyone in the van to drive the two older ones to school.  I thought God was asking more of me than was fair!  But we all survived.  My husband returned from military training when I was about 16 weeks along, to my great relief.
When I was 19 weeks pregnant, an ultrasound showed that my newest baby was a girl, and the doctors also told me that she would be born with a cleft lip and a cleft palate.  I was blown away.  I felt like God was REALLY being unfair.  Here I am being all “virtuous” about handling an unplanned fifth baby, and then God sends me a special-needs baby?  I did tons of research and learned that feeding a baby with a cleft palate could be very difficult — that many moms reported spending all their time just trying to feed their cleft palate baby, forget caring for other children.  I was crushed. “How would I possibly manage all this on my own?!!”, I wondered.  After indescribable worry and stress, my little girl made her appearance about four months later.  She almost died at birth when she was unable to breathe on her own, but soon stabilized after she was intubated with a breathing tube.  After she stabilized, my husband and I were told that she didn’t have a cleft palate after all, just a cleft lip and a small cleft through her gum. I was so relieved that she was alive that worrying about her palate seemed insignificant to me at that point!  Now, two months later, we are a very happy (and very busy) family.  My fifth baby has turned out to be the sweetest, easiest-to-care for baby ever… and she breastfeeds like a champ.  She also has the most gorgeous plentiful bright red hair… and beautiful bright blue eyes, like a clear freshwater lake on a lovely summer’s day.  She is also very beautiful, even with her cleft lip, and adds so much to our family dynamic.  She brings out the most wonderful things in her three big brothers, and her big sister.  I can’t imagine this family without her.  We have her lip repair surgery scheduled next month, and I am very relieved by how this whole thing has turned out.  It is very hard work to have a 6-year-old, an almost 5-year-old, a 3 yr old, a 20 month old and a 2 month old, especially with a military husband and no family/friend support, but with God’s grace, I’m doing it.  I wouldn’t give up any one of them for anything.  They are all absolutely irreplaceable.  It’s hard, but not as hard as not having them in my life.  We women are much tougher than our present-day culture gives us credit for.  In tough times, we can make it through… and make it through carrying our babies.  Anyone that would tell us to get rid of our babies in order to make it ourselves or for “the good of our families” either has no concept of how strong we women are, or else merely wants to exploit us for the sake of their own ideologies or wallet, in my opinion.  You can’t save a woman without also saving her baby.  Like it or not, the two are inseparable.  From where I’m sitting, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Children are exhausting, maddening, frustrating… and infinitely precious.  There is no other gift other than the gift of salvation that does so much  for us.

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3 thoughts on “Jane’s Story

  1. God bless you and your beautiful family through Jesus Christ our Lord! Your story is truly inspiring and I am so proud of you and womanhood when I see stories like this.
    Thank you for helping me with my own story presently unfolding! You have renewed my strength! Thank you Jesus for blessing us women so richly.☺️❤️

  2. Such an amazing story. Really inspired me. Am presently expecting an unplanned baby, my fourth. I thought I was done with three and had everything planned out until this surprise. With a very busy job, I need all the support I can get as abortion is not an option. Your story has encouraged me and has helped me trust in God to see me through it all.

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